“I've been asleep and I don't know if it's the same day or week or year, but who the hell cares anyway?”

¿Haven’t you ever felt like you don’t want to know anything else about the rest of the world? Just because you are tired of its heaviness. Some people think they are carrying the entire Earth, but it’s a feeling that almost nothing can help you to get rid of it. I know how this girl feels, because I’d felt just like that. Nothing really matters; nothing is good enough to take the pain and the heaviness away. So all you can just do is lie face down, put your hands covering your neck, and wish that the bad stuff finally ends. But then you realize that the main source or the bad stuff is yourself, which leads you to the tearing and desperate wish to disappear. And when you realize you can’t, everything starts to matter less than before, even when you thought that was not possible. You may scream all day, you may be paralyzed of fear. But even if you scream, it feels like no one can hear you. Because no one else exists. Tired of hating, hating to be tired. You only know you are in a safe place, when you stop being there, in that whole where you’ve got to carry the universe.

"used to think I was the only one who felt things, but I really am only one infinitely small part of an aching humanity."

It also helps you to remember you're not the only one who matters...

VOCABULARY

ZEALOT-a fervent and even militant proponent of something

“The religious zealot was willing to break the law to follow his prophet’s orders.”

WONKY- turned or twisted toward one side

“And will now fly to Melbourne for a re-assessment of his wonky right knee.” 

VERMILLION- of a vivid red to reddish-orange color

“Mi pants were unique because they were vermillion.”

 

QUELL- suppress or crush completely

“Her words did nothing to quell the anger boiling within him.”

UNCANNY-surpassing the ordinary or normal

“It was uncanny the way he could anticipate trouble.”